November result and Overall Table

Second win of the season for D'oh D'oh Dunkin.

Due to 'administrative' errors a slightly under populated sixsome contested an OFFICIAL game at Kev's Colosseum earlier this month. The result wiz:

1. DunderDonut
2. Shantanamo Gay
3. Petawatt
4. Dr 'Spreadum'
5. The Gent
6. Killawatt

Making this the latest championship table:

15 games played (8 h+1)        P    Wins     2nd     Last     Pts     Ave

The Doctor                            12      3        0          2       119    9.917
Wee Rambo                           8       2        2          1       101   12.625
The Bonfire                            9       2         2         0        105   11.667
GingaStinga                           14      2         2         1        153   10.929
Killawatt                                 15      2        3         3        141    9.400
Dunderfunk                            10      2        1         2         85     8.500
The One True Gentleman      14      1        2         1        151   10.786
Petawatt                                15      0        2         1        149    9.933
Sea Cock                               8       0        1         2         44     5.500

Bottleneck                              7      1        0        2          47      6.714
The Baptist                             3      0        0        0          18      6.000
Wattinlaw                               2      0        0        0           8       4.000

2012 Championship Game - Pre Match Hype

More final table heartache for the GingaStinga???

OMG - It's only the 2012 Championship decider!!!

As is customary, the last game of the season is the first game of the subsequent calendar year. 2012 is yet to be decided.

Saturday 5th January
at
C&FW Services Colosseum.

Once again our sponsor is generously providing prizes. As in previous years, these will go to the 2nd & 3rd placed positions in the Showcase Game with first place snaffling the cash as is Written in the Great PP$ Book of Unwritten Rules!!! I'm sad to report that yet again we've been shunned by every single television broadcaster so the world will miss out on our particular brand of tasty caird action.

The current table is coming up, then some comment on what's at stake for the movers and shakers. I've also especially added the total points range/swing each player can achieve giving an idea how far up/down the placings each player can rise/fall.

Max - Assumes a win added to present totals
Min - Assumes a last place added to present totals

                                               P     W     2nd     L     Pts     Ave          (Max/Min)
Gingle Berries                        14     4       3       3     152     10.857     (11.467/10.133)
The Gynaecologist                 13     3       4       1     162     12.462     (13.000/11.571)
Killawatt                                 14     3       0       0     162     11.571     (12.133/10.800)
Sea Cock                                 8     2       0       0      83     10.375     (11.444/9.222)
Wee Rambo                           12     1       2       0     133     11.083     (11.769/10.230)
Bottleneck                              13     1       1       6       70      5.385     (6.429/5.000)
Petawatt                                 15     0       2       0     153     10.200     (10.813/9.563)
The One True Gentleman       14     0       2       2     116     8.286     (9.067/7.733)

The Former Blouse                   7     1       1       2      56     8.000     (9.500/7.000)
The Baptist                                3     0       0       2       8      2.667     (7.000/2.000)

Or will the GingaRadge be laughing all the way to the engravers?

16 games have been played this season making the golden HalfPlusOne mark 9, therefore Dunderfunk is just squeezed out of qualification for the overall final table.

Petawatt will have played the most games in 2012.

Bottleneck has had a disaster, but the one win means he cannot finish last. The Gentleman must win to avoid the wooden spoon, it's between him and Petawatt and he can't catch the latter on points swing alone.

If The Gentleman does win, GingaRadge would win the trophy, which would obviously also be the case if GingaRadge wins on the night.

There are two other players in contention, serial champion Killawatt or one time winner The Doctor. If either of them win on the night, they'll walk away with our spangly monument to poker greatness. Not literally of course because they'll both be kipping in the venue that night. Gingle Berries requires a win by anyone EXCEPT that gruesome twosome on January 5th to lift The Trophy.

Should Dr Gynaecologist win the match and therefore the championship, it will be a phenomenal three year run. Champion in 2010, wooden spoon in 2011, can he go from hero to zero to hero again this season? Nicknames involving yo-yo's are massing on my horizon.

With a combined appearances total of 27, 2012 has basically been owned by The Doctor and GingaPrince who have been heads up or better 14 times between them. Killawatt has only made the last two on three occasions, but has somehow done enough to stay right in contention as we reach the season decider.

Wee Rambo has struggled to turn his good showings into hard championship contending stats but will surely be quite happy with his first full season in our exalted company.

Without looking back on previous seasons, I suspect this is Sea Cock's best ever finish, a win could even propel him higher up the final table. At this stage the blog must retract it's previous aspersions on his good name (they already have been in person, but the internet must also be told). He was a no-show at the last game through no fault of his own, but because the Colosseum staff overlooked his invite. Would never have happened in the Albion Road days.

So, the wooden spoon and trophy are undecided and the excitement levels could hardly be higher.

Formerly The Damage, now it's Fiscal Cliff

Hopefully our honorary member, the stateside President Cliff Fiscal will be able to drop in during the munchie break for a chat. I'm sure he sends his best wishes.

All the best from your humble scribe too. Remember your shirts!!! See you there.

PS: There appears to be a statistical inaccuracy in the table. The last place finishes column totals 16 when only 15 games have been played. Please check your results and let me know who I've added the extra ignominious marker to!!!

Championship Table

The Gentleman's position (geddit?)

The Doctor moves up one place at the expense of Sea Cock and Killawatt after his latest victory now giving GingaRadge a third reason to keep looking over his shoulder as he pursues the trophy. Despite appearances to the contrary, the Doctor's record of six top-two finishes in 11 games suggests either he is indeed a canny player, or alternatively the rest of us just canny play. I speak at least for myself in this last respect. However it has been noted that my prescription at the beginning of Heids-up in the last game that he should down his Bomb forthwith to help increase either his chances of winning or negation of pain in the case of a defeat quite spectacularly propelled him to the 'W'.

Conversely to The Doctor, Petawatt, a seeming paragon of clever consistency at the table finds himself languishing winless and too close to the wooden spoon for comfort. Indeed, if anyone beats me to the wooden spoon after the form and luck I've unbeknowingly inflicted upon myself, they'll have to seriously consider their future in cairds altogether.

Half Plus One = 7

Gingle Berries                       12    4    3    3    145   12.083
Dr Doctor                              11    2    4    1    128   11.636
Killawatt                                 12    2    0    0    127   10.583
Sea Cock                                8     2    0    0     83    10.375
Wee Rambo                           10    1    1    0    106   10.600
Bottleneck                               11    1    1    4     70     6.364
Petawatt                                  13    0    2    0    138   10.615
The One True Gentleman      12    0    2    2     93     7.750

Next game is scheduled for the Rare Books Arena on Saturday 24th November I do believe. Sadly this will most likely be the last game at aforementioned venue due to previous nocturnal shenanigans (purely a euphemism, activities may well have been during daylight).

Up To Date Table

Half way through the year, half way through the season, has to be said, still anyone's championship. Half plus one is currently 5 games and shall remain so after next week (21st July @ Kev's Colosseum).

A machine for zapping Watts!!!!

                         P     W     2nd     L     Pts     Ave

Killawatt           7       2       0       0      92     13.14

GingaStinga     8        2       2       2      88     11.00

The Doctor       6       1       2        0      75     12.50

Wee Rambo     6       1        1      0       51      8.50

Bottleneck        7       1        0      3       45      6.43

Petawatt           8       0       1       0       87     10.88

The Raiser        8       0        2      1       74      9.25

Sea Cock         3       1        0       0      27      9.00

Dundertrump    4       0        0       2      17      4.25

Some stunning stats. Dunderfunk must decide if it's actually worthwhile qualifying with half + 1 this year. Could be a worst of all time. Conversely, The 2010 Champion has finished top 2 in half his games. One to watch. As has the GingaPrincess who is a model of consistency with form comparable to a monthly grenade blast!!! She (surely he) must look back on that defeat by Ol' Sea Cock with regret, it would have put her (him) into a very strong position. And as usual its the Colosseum owner who continues to ride his decade long wave of luck up the top.

Saturday May 19th - Result & Latest Table

Radge

1. Gingle Berries
2. Wee Rambo
3. The Raiser
4. Petawatt
5. Bottleneck

Apologies: The Gynaecologist (Londinium), Killawatt (Deaths Door), Dunderfunk (Washing his hair again), The Professor (Retired), The Damage (Babysitting).

Taking advantage of a weakened field at the Rare Books Arena on Saturday, The Ginga Prince bagged his second win of the season to explode to the top of the 2012 table with some "unstoppable fackin cairds". His words. Backed up by a flotilla of pairs with some bullets thrown in, when the blinds began to bite, Messrs Rambo & Raiser couldn't find an answer!!!

The last hand exemplified what had gone before. Heads up the Ginga Prince (3-3) and Wee Rambo (Q-J) found themselves in a classic Texas Hold'em showdown. The flop helped neither before a killer Jack appeared on the turn. Then the river produced an even more killer 3. Quite a sight watching their 'Happiness Graphs' shoot past each other in opposite directions.

Earlier, much earlier, Bottleneck was first to exit with unseemly haste. A pre-flop raise by in-form Mr Raiser holding A-10 couldn't shake him off. The Raiser hit both cards on the flop and raised again, but was in turn re-raised all-in by the host. All the Raiser could do was call and hope to hold up, which he did when Bottleneck turned over Q-10 which appeared to be gasping for air. You'd struggle to get a Chilean miner out of a hole like that!!! Back to the drawing board for Bottleneck or the recent win might attract 'fluke' status.

After the break Petawatt bowed out around the beginning of GingaStinga's assault. KQ might be good enough most of the time, but AA in the hands of the GingaAssasin ended Petawatt's participation.

The Raiser has spent a little too much time recently whinging about bad beats and naturally, this continued well into the evening. Having more than covered Wee Rambo in the previous game four times and without prevailing, he came to the conclusion that the only way to tackle the Luckius Gittus was to go all-in miles behind. The opportunity arose with a 3-4 off-suit pre-flop and all Rambo's chips on the table but the walk didn't match his talk and he folded. The rabbit was chased and a 6-high straight for The Raiser would have sent Wee Rambo crashing. What a game eh???

After being ahead at the break, the blinds were squeezing as they do and The Raiser eventually chucked a couple of grand at four clubs on the flop. The GingaAssasin was at it again though, pairing his K on the flop and avoiding clubs henceforth to make it 'Cash-on-the-table' time.

Quite a good game I thought, Bobby Bawbag might disagree. Your scribe played quite well with sweet cards for the first half. Then there was a bit of a 3-way tussle near the end before the Ginger Spring swept all before it. Some unusual composure from Young Rambo was in evidence with less of an issue regarding the Break than normal. In the end, the cards were the winner.

No date or venue for the next game yet. I'm keen and I'm sure those with Manflu or other barely credible excuses will also be keen to re-engage, so come on Wattleneck Fixtures Committee, get emailing.

Finally, below is the up to date table for 2012.

                       P    W   2nd     L   Pts    Ave
GingaStinga     6     2      1     2    60    10.00
The Doctor      4     1      1     0    53    13.25
Killawatt           5     1      0     0    61    12.20
Wee Rambo    6     1      1     0    51     8.50
Bottleneck        5     1      0     2    40     8.00
Petawatt          6     0      1     0    65    10.83
The Raiser       6     0      2     1    58     9.67

4 games must have been played to qualify.

Latest Table

Killa on a recent trip to Vegas

Despite being four games into the new season and having four different winners, the top of table already has a depressingly familiar look to it.

Half +1 is currently 3 games meaning that the two tailgunners at the foot of the table are included out of charity. I'll shave off under-attenders in a month or two as the standings really hot up. However H+1 will remain at 3 after the next game therefore possibly allowing Thunderfunk officially back into things should he be able to attend.

As we're still at an early stage, a single victory for anyone could make a massive shift in standings. Example: The Professor returns for the next game, wins and goes top with an ave of 20.000. Stranger things have happened (The Pussy Doctor has won an Annual Championship after all).


                                      P    W    2nd   L    Pts    Ave
Killawatt                        4      1      0     0     49    12.250
Bottleneck                     3      1      0     1     34     11.333
GingaPrince                   4      1      1     1     40     10.000
Wee Rambo                  4      1      0     0     27      6.750
The Raiser                     4      0      2     1     45     11.250
Petawatt                        4      0      0     0     45     11.250
The Gynaecologist         3      0      1     0     33     11.000
Sea Cock                      1      0      0     0      5       5.000
Daddy Dunkbucket        2     0      0     1      9       4.500

Feel free to keep an eye on your totals and double check my sums. If I get anything wrong I'll update it asap.

Table

                           P   W   L   Pts    Ave
1. GingaRadge    2    1    0    35    17.5
2. Bottleneck      2    1    1    20     10.0
3. The Doctor    1     0    0    17     17.0
4. Petawatt         2    0    0     26    13.0
5. Paintbrush      1    0    0      9      9.0
6. Killawatt         2   0    0     17     8.5
7. Sea Cock       1    0   0     5       5.0
8. The Raiser      2    0   1     8       4.0
9. Wee Rambo   2    0   0     5      2.50

Next game has been moved from The Doctors Surgery due to NHS cuts and shall be held at Kevs Colosseum on Saturday 3rd March.

Hope to see 9 of you there!!!

2011 - Final Table

Killawatt leading the Final Table!!!

Points of note:

• Absolutely no change in positions from the last table although Da Blouse only just managed, by finishing 8th, to hold off The Raiser who would have moved up from 5th to 3rd with a win instead of a RU spot.
• Bottleneck finished 4th on the Points Table, 5th in the Averages Table but only 7th where it matters most!!!
• After compiling the penultimate table, I chucked out the 'results sheet'. Therefore I can't include a runners-up/heads-up column as requested by GingaStinga. I'll include it for 2012 onwards.
• 17 games played, 17 wins in the win column. This confirms Wee Rambo did win a game. It may have been a 5-player and may not have felt like a full-on PP$ is all I can say to your claims not to have won a game. I'm absolutely positive you did. If I wasn't your win column would say 0 quicker than it takes GingaStinga to pot re-raise with a middling pair.
• If The Prof had played one more game, the race for the wooden spoon with The Doc would have been interesting.
• If the table was sorted by average points, GingaStinga would have finished second last.
• The Doctor goes from Hero to Zero.

                              P     W     L    Pts    Ave

Killawatt                 17     9     2     260    15.294
Petawatt                 15     2     0     195    13.000
GingaStinga             9     2     3      78      8.667
Da Blouse                9     1     0      93     10.33
The Raiser              16     1     2    164    10.25
The Buoy                  9     1     2     81     9.000
Bottleneck               15     0     2    136    9.067
The Doctor              14     0     2     80     5.714

Wee Rambo           4     1     2     22    5.500
Beef Razor             1     0     0     10    10.000
The Damage           1     0     0      8      8.000
Nico                        1     0     0      8      8.000
The Professor        8     0     2     45     5.625
Liam                      1     0     1     0      0.000

Poker Table

A Poker Table!!!

With only The Championship Game remaining, I can announce that to qualify for the final 2011 Ranking Table (after the next game) you will be required to have played NINE games. This leaves three regulars teetering on the edge of ignominy as the latest updated table below shows and makes The Damage's chances of qualification rather slim.

Incidentally, a 'watt' is defined as a derived unit of power. Hmmm!!!

                                  P    W    L    Pts    Ave
1. KillaWatt              16    8     2    240  15.000
2. MegaWatt            14    2     0    182  13.000
3. GingaStinga           8     2     3      69    8.625
4. DaBlouse              8     1     0      88   11.000
5. The Raiser            15    1     2    147    9.800
6. The Buoy               8     1     2      70    8.750
7. Bottleneck            14   0     2     121   8.643
8. The Doctor          13   0     2      78    6.000

9. Wee Rambo          3    1    1       22    7.333
10. BeefRazor           1    0     0      10   10.000
=11. The Damage     1    0     0        8    8.000
=11. Nico                  1    0     0        8    8.000
13. The Professor     7    0    2      38    5.429
14. Liam                    1    0    1       0     0.000